I said it yesterday, and I did it! Here it is, all done:
(Please excuse the ruffling in the last round, it is unblocked… but I kinda like it this way, frilly and fancy.)
I very much enjoyed being able to tat again, but I had a couple of reasons for rushing through this comeback project.
For one, I was given the threads by someone who did not know much about my preference in colour and size. I used to complain all the time during my hiatus about not being able to tat, so one day she gave them to me and told me to find solace in imagining what I would tat with them when my finger was completely healed. What she did not know was that I do not like too many colours in a project, and I do not work with thick threads.
It got me thinking… was she just being nice to me, or was she trying to tell me something else with this choice of gift? Maybe I should be reading into the details to find hidden meanings?
Like, maybe that she was sick of hearing me blab on and on about my love for tatting?
And maybe she thought I would like it less, and in turn talk less about it, if I had to work with threads I did not like too much?
For another, and possibly because of the aforementioned reason, I figured I would make this project a test to see how much muscle memory I retained and get caught up as quickly as possible to the level I was at before the hiatus. I chose a simple and easy pattern, using only one shuttle and requiring only the abilities to tat regular rings and chains… in other words, boring!
I was thinking, I could probably jump right back in and pick up where I left off. But maybe this will be my last chance that I would ever consider taking on an aesthetically pleasing but dull project (I usually prefer to work on technically challenging and intricately detailed patterns).
And maybe I would not feel too sorry about ruining the threads that I did not choose myself, while I try to get the tatting feeling back in my fingers.
Well, well, what an unappreciative, arrogant person I was!
As I tatted on with the colourful thick threads, I began to focus more on the fine details of this project. A multitude of bright colours got me to become cheerful and not so bored after all, and a bigger size of stitches made me become aware of the unstable tension and uneven picots. Had I not worked with these threads, I would never have noticed how much I still have to learn and what a long way I still have to go before I can tackle the more difficult projects.
How could I have forgotten that I am still a novice in tatting?! I am still at a stage where I have to get back to the basics before I try something new. I still have to pay attention to the details so I would not miss anything important hidden there.
And all of a sudden, another thought came down – maybe I am just as unappreciative and arrogant in other things as well?
Maybe I overestimate myself in some way?
Maybe I am somehow condescending to others?
Maybe I only see what I want to see and hear what I want to hear, and ignore all else that may be hidden in the details?
In the end, I was rushing to finish this project so I could show the person who gave me the threads how it turned out and thank her for the gift. And maybe she can find hidden in the details of my gratitude how grateful I am that she reminded me to be appreciative and humble in all other aspects of my life.
Oh, but as much as I appreciate her caring for me, I do not think I can hide my wish to humbly decline any further offer of threads!