Thoughts for Myself

In your own time

Maybe time is universal.

It passes by the second in everyone. It will not wait for anyone. And it only goes forward, without exception.

 

But may be time is not equal.

Some have plenty, others never have enough. Some grow faster, others age slower. Some dwell on the past, others live only for the moment, still others dream of the future.

 

So, is time absolute or relative? Maybe a little bit of both.

It is absolute, and maybe that is why we can share it with others.

And at the same time, it is relative, and maybe that is why we can have our own time.

 

I have always struggled with wanting to share time with you at times, but wanting to have my own time at other times. But maybe these seemingly contradictory feelings need not be mutually exclusive… because time has both aspects. Maybe I do not need to feel bad about wanting both.

 

Then, maybe you can stop for a moment so I can pursue both? I think I can better share time with you if I can first have some time of my own.

Maybe you can stop saying you will let me have time to think it through, then rush me to reach a conclusion.

Maybe you can stop saying you will let me take time off if I feel the need, then press me to come back.

Maybe you can stop saying you will let me do things in my own time, then never allow me that time.

 

I know it is not easy for you to let me go. I can see how heartbreaking it must be for you to set me free. But I want you to let me take my own sweet time to become my own person… because time with you is finite, but time with myself is infinite. And I want to be able to live with myself even after you and I finish sharing time.

 

I want you to let me go. But I know you still find it difficult to let me loose. So I will not give you a hard time – I shall wait patiently until you come to a point where you will willingly set me free, in your own time.

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