Thoughts for Myself

Obstructions to overcome

Some people make me feel like I am talking to a wall. It is so thick, I have no idea if I am getting through to them at all. I look for any kind of reaction, but they simply bounce back words that I throw at them. They are so quick to rebut and refuse and reject everything I say, they drive me up the wall!

 

But hang on here, if they are like walls, and I am driven up walls, then maybe I will eventually find a way to climb over them?

 

Maybe I should stop running into these walls at full speed, trying to break them down.

When I get frustrated of my words not being taken seriously (or not taken at all), I am inclined to choose more direct words and harsher expressions to get through. Sometimes, I will break through… but more often, I will face thicker walls that become even harder to get through upon the next encounter. So, maybe it would be wiser to shift my focus from getting through to climbing over, and make an approach run instead.

 

And maybe I should approach the walls not just head on but from many different angles.

When I see my words get bounced back, I tend to want to throw more of the same words at lesser intervals straight at the bull’s eye in the hopes that some will get through. Sometimes, I will get a few across… but more often, the more I throw the more I see getting bounced back and piling up in front of me, building another wall in front of the original. So, maybe it would be wiser to mix it up, throwing different words at different intervals and at different spots, and find places where they bounce off differently, or even stick to become footholds.

 

Once I have some footholds, maybe I should only look up and not be scared of the height I may fall if I slip up.

When I am repeatedly denied being heard and knocked down, I become prone to feeling incapable of ever getting through. Sometimes, I am still able to find courage to get back up once more… but more often, I am made to feel like the walls have become taller and get intimidated by how much further I will fall if I get knocked down the next time. So, maybe it would be wiser to not look down and remind myself unnecessarily of the negative consequences that may never happen.

 

I suppose there will always be some people with whom I will experience a severe communication breakdown. And I imagine there will be many times I will be driven up the wall trying to talk to the walls between them and me. But I must wise up and fight the urge to, on the one hand resort to force to break through them, and on the other hand become so discouraged, lose faith in myself to get to where I want.

 

Maybe before I can establish a good communication line with these people, these urges are the walls I must first climb over… the obstructions to overcome.

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