It is finally that time of the year again!
It has been six months since the last publication, and as usual, I ran to the bookstore to get it. But this time, it was not a regular publication in many ways – for one, it was made much bigger! (I placed the same pencil for reference… can you tell the size difference?)
And with less number of puzzles, at about 60% of regular publication, and a generally lower degree of difficulty, but priced at a higher cost, at about 45% more than regular publication, I hesitated to buy it. But only for a moment – I could not walk away knowing that there will be unsolved puzzles of kakuro out there! So I bought it, and I happily stayed up very late for a couple of nights to tackle all of them.
But I am still a little puzzled. Puzzled about why there were no regular publication, and why a much bigger version was put out instead. And the mystery remains as to whether or not a regular publication is still to come this year. I looked everywhere for some kind of explanation, but I am completely stumped by this brain-teaser. So this time, although I whizzed through to the end of the booklet in record time, I still do not feel I have solved all problems.
I was not dissatisfied with the publication this time around.
But maybe I did not attain the same level of satisfaction as with the ones before it.
Maybe if I knew why this particular booklet was published, in the size and volume and difficulty and price it came, I would still have complained, but I would have shown a little more understanding.
And maybe I would have been a lot less critical of the irregularities.
I have not lost my love for the puzzle. I am so certain I will rush to the bookstore, just like this time and the many times before, when I hear the next news of publication, in any size and volume and difficulty and price it comes. And I have no doubt I will buy it and happily spend many a night sleepless.
But the unexplained irregularity this time has planted a few seeds of suspicion in my mind.
Maybe the kakuro population is not growing as big as it was expected to, pushing the publisher to produce a booklet intended for new targets.
And/or, maybe they have nearly exhausted their existing puzzle creators, while being widely unsuccessful recruiting anew. (I really wish I could become one, but I just do not seem to have the talent… *BIG SIGH*)
And as such, maybe there will be no more regular publications and I will have to be satisfied with whatever I am given, without explanation, so long as I stay in love with it.
The dynamics of love is so rarely in balance. It is so hard to receive as much as you give, yet once in love, you cannot help but give… and you most likely love being in that state! But suspicion, however small, can weigh a tonne and tip the scale in the opposite direction, unless some kind of explanation is provided.
I shall think hard of ways to balance the dynamics of my love for kakuro… for starters, any kakuro creators out there, RSVP to save this poor little puzzle-crazed soul!